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Conflicting food philosophy

February 17, 2012

I am a plus size girl and weight has been a constant companion of mine for a long time.  I have had some success in losing it and some times when I am not successful.  My most two recent successes involved weight watchers and working with a trainer/nutritionist.  One thing that dominated those successes was my eating of a) easy frozen meals with a set number of calories or b) high protein/high veggie diets.

I found that these plans didn’t sit right with my soul.  I believe in real whole food made from scratch.  I believe that eating more like my grandparents did is better than eating something that came out of a box.  I think that meat should come from animals you raise or at the very least from a farmer you know and I think more than 5 ingredients in any food you buy is bad.
Those believes don’t work well when your weight watchers diet consists of smart ones or your trainer wants you to eat 9ox of lean protein a day but all you raised was chicken and pigs.  The trainers plan becomes a little unwieldy when you don’t believe in buying chicken breasts from the grocery store.

So my weight is up again and I am not happy, not feeling good about myself.  To be fair to myself (as we all should) I have not been able to exercise for the past three weeks due to some back issue and that is playing on my self-esteem and my weight.  But even with exercise I have to be honest and say I have gained weight.

How did my grandmother do it!  I can recognize that back then my Gramma didn’t have a desk job so she worked her butt off during the day, worked hard enough that counting calories wasn’t an issue.  I have a desk job – 2 in fact – even at the height of my running (oh how I have missed you!) it wouldn’t have matched the work she did.  And they also ate off of 9″ plates, which is an upcoming post.

I can also recognize that society has a different marker for aesthetics and fitness than we did 60 years ago.

And I recognize that healthy can mean something different to everyone.  But even with all of that I am struggling; struggling to figure out how to eat local/seasons/traditional – something that feels so right in my soul while being able to be at a healthier weight.

The “right” plan is the plan that is right for me but I want both.  I want seasonal local eating in a state where 6 months out of the year root vegetables dominate your life and to be a size 10 (dream big people!).
I just haven’t figured out the plan yet.

One Comment leave one →
  1. Sandy Bussiere permalink
    February 18, 2012 9:35 am

    Your issues with food are shared by so many of us. It is so refreshing to have someone comfortable enough in their own skin to be able to be so open about their personal struggle. No food in the last four hours before going to bed is great for the waistline but not real easy when the most important person in your life is having, as Fred says “a little snack” at 9 pm. And cooking a palm-sized portion of protein is so healthy but a savory pot of something wonderful screams out for a 2nd small portion before being put away. And how can a woman live without chocolate? Or wine? Eat healthy. Exercise in moderation. And love yourself. As others love you.

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